Everyday

by Joel Houston/Hillsong Publishing

What to say Lord it's
You who gave me life
ANd I CAn't explain
Just how much you mean to me
Now that You Have saved me Lord
I Give All that I am to you
That Every day I can
Be A light that shines Your name

EVERY DAY LORD
I'LL LEARN TO STAND UPON YOUR WORD
AND I PRAY THAT I MIGHT
COME TO KNOW YOU MORE
WON'T YOU GUIDE ME IN
EVERY SINGLE STEP I TAKE AND
EVERYDAY I WILL
BE YOUR LIGHT UNTO THE WORLD

EVERY DAY IT'S YOU I LIVE FOR
EVERY DAY I'LL FOLLOW AFTER YOU
EVERY DAY I'LL WALK WITH YOU MY LORD

IT'S YOU I LIVE FOR EVERY DAY (3X)

listened to this song in the morning (not the first time).. and it's a reminder and a prayer..
coz it's a challenge for me now..

from Lincoln Brewster's All to You CD! (thanks Sandz!!) it's really cool.



LOVE THE LORD (Lincoln Brewster)

Love the Lord with all your heart
With All your soul
With all your mind and with all your strenght (2x)

With All your heart with all your soul
with all your mind with all your strenght
Love the Lord with all your heart
With All your soul
With all your mind and with all your strenght

Serve the Lord with all your heart....
(part or the song)


I wanna love God and serve Him with all my heart!

Gourmet Coffee..

There's a new coffee making machine right in my office pantry..Expresso? cappucino?
If you know how to make it. premium coffee.. Starbucks or coffebean free flow..

(it cost a few K, given by courier company) heh.. they feed with with loads of goodies from mooncakes to umbrellas to Chrismas cakes!)
haha. made my first cup of premium coffee today. yeah.. taste good! And I'm not a coffee drinker/person..
keke.

Blessed rite? nice coffee anytime when i'm sleepy.. no more Nescafe Gold classic mix with Milo to make Mocha! wahhaa.

Btw, my company's really great.
Standard Freeflow:
COKE, COKE light, Green tea (Pokka/Heaven & Earth),
Hot beverages (Tea, green tea, Coffee, Milo)
Cup Instant noodle,
Biscuits (Jacob & assorted)

Others:
occasional miscellenous snacks (including from Taiwan, HK, Thai, UK, anywhere.. when bosses and collegues fly overseas for business trip or when anyone feel like buying any)

Covance 2005 (last end 2 Quarter)

Reception - Opening of Covance new office space in early Aug 05.. where all the 'big shots fr US came down to launch.




Heh.. this my workstation in a messy state..
My boss's room right in front..:P He's a nice good boss (Wife's a 'Christian', he's not.. yet)



My dear collegues Mike & Law.. the only 2 guys collegue besides my boss in my department. You won't wanna see what one always do to the other..




CLS(Central Lab Services) at Chevron KTV session (i was long away..for Unit or SubD or something..)
They belongs to the other Business Unit where Hannah/Shufen belongs to. Yet we share the same office space/work inclose proximity! Except for the rest of the lab people who are largely in the lab except for lunch, tea or after work hours. Which I seldom mix with.




Oh.. my blessed bowl of porridge cooked by my faithful aunt early in the morning.. or ones in a purple moon at night.

other photos not with me or available yet.

When God Speaks to you at your waking moments..

better capture it down before it slippes away..

this morning, i woke up with conviction in my heart to the situation that I'm in, that I have been approaching it in a wrong way.
The Holy Spirit reminded me or convicted (still to be tested..) me through what my Shepherd taught/talked to me before not too long ago.

3 or 4 times I woke up with the same thought and conviction (coz i went back to sleep again - not time's up yet or was I lazing) of my wrong and guilt and the need to change. or at least what to change..

And after really waking up, i felt a sense of closeness and freshness with God, my heart lighthen and some burden lifted..

Long time I have ever felt such.. refreshed, or clear hearted to be in the presence of God..

(Or did God have to speak to me at my waking moments coz i was too clouded to seek or hear Him speak at other moments of the day..) ;P

'Spiritual Decline'

Drafted 1 week ago and cont' today

For some moments of thought, I asked my self if I have experienced backsliding.
But analysing my relationship with God, I thought no, backsliding would be slipping away or turning away from God.
Hence, today spiritual decline's the word which I feel more aptly describe my recent status. Or so I thought - (temporarily till I get the right analysis if and when I do!)
I feel not so spiritually inclined, takes me a harder time to intake the Word of God, takes a lot more effort for the Word to make sense to me,
And more self-centredness, disobedient spirit, doing things my way, my feelings get into way.

That is when SIN gets into the way. I feel so hard to be spirit-filled, waging war again my sinful nature - thoughts, desires and ways.
It's a battle. Hence it's a struggle.
For the past few weeks, or more then a month.

Like what Andrew mentioned, think I need to take a BATH, not just clean myself. Sin have been accumulating.
Wrong spirit and focus, yet it is so subtle.

How did it start? What's the root cause?

Written today:
The initial phase I was in..(long story..)
But briefly:
1st I was deeply troubled in mind and heart due to some thoughts/'visions' I had.
Then it leads to me being easily angered, frustrated and bitter towards people when they start getting on my nerves and pissing me off. To my leaders or shepherd or whoever. Even the taxi driver who wanted to drive me to Or"CHARD" Rd instead of City Harvest "CHURCH").
... Behold my anger. Rub me the wrong way..don't think I won't scold you..
Even William sometime back during this period finds me angry coz I scolded him also for something. Hahaha
(of course when such things happen, the problem is me, not people, even if they pose a problem to you.)

The holy spirit still reminds me things, thank God & Praise God!.

Things got better a little, as I realize the state and sin I'm allowing myself to commit if I continue, tried to apologize to a few people. Nvm.
Finally talked to my shepherd the start/initial part of my dilemma.
Things progressed so fast (for the better/worst)in WEEKS pace, that I didn't really get to update my shepherd any much.

I got better I felt. And really thank God I did a little, or else I would have got into real argument or fight with my sheep. Thank God I didn't la, else it'll be irreversible damage done.
God knows the timing yeah.. and I prayed lah. He knows my limit.

The week progressed, thought I still feel not in full gear spiritually speaking.
……

However all along, despite what I was/am going through, at the back of my mind I know that God is allowing/putting me to go through something. It is a realistic situation and even struggle which needs my action. And in accordance and obedience with His Word to experience how to breakthrough it.

Few impt things are:
1. Being able to identify with many many people why and how they'll feel and do what they do, (my mum, my bro, my sheep, my CG mates etc. and other people in general)
2. God is revealing some of the areas of my life which I was covered up with something else instead of really being cleaned and transformed by Him.
Including this area which i connected with how I've been managing emotions incl anger. I was never an angry person, (not until lately). If you make me angry then you're seriously in deep trouble..
……….
……….
Circumstance changes pretty fast..
But what bout me? (I'm learning to not be swayed (feelings etc.) and affected by circumstances but manage how I am based on the foundation and principles of WOG.. As I'm tested now..)
Things progressed really fast this past week.. I don't know what I'm into..

Until…

(to be con't)

Yet if I let emotions and sin grip me & continually so, i'll screw up everything around me. very quickly, many damages will be done. In the end, destruction will come. As your spiritual life spiral down hill and wither away as you fall further away into sin and away from God. And there'll be no more.. Psalms 1 and Psalm somewhere.
It'll be robbing off the blessings around me, and God won't be able to use me as His vessel and channel to do His work.

Ahhh... i cannot take it already!!!!!!
i'm going insane.
Don't want to feel this way yet i am.

i'm probably going to be in a bad mood until I let God take over me.

Confirmation Letter & bonus!

Got my confirmation of emloyment letter (company) on Monday (5 Dec) and 2005 bonus pay out slip yesterday!
Yeay!
…thank God for His favor and providence and leading me into this current job.
Although my bonus's not a lot. (only a quarter of my salary. The complicated calculation is 80% of your individual bonus opportunity target (which is 5%) = 4% of your bonus eligible earnings)
and didn't feel extremely happy, but am really thankful for whatever I get. :)

Daisy & me at our farewell cum my post-Birthday celeb!! late Aug 05??





CAfe Cartel at Suntec. ordered a giant 'ice-cream' that when it came, we frantically started calling people we know who could possibly come help us eat it!

posted this because it's a nice memory. and my ex-shepherd/spiritual mentor has served God as my shepherd and I'm trully blessed by the past 2 years from mid 2003-2005 which she 'took care' or guided of me,not only in my spiritual walk but hollistically. Giving me lots teaching (principles & Word of God) which proves useful and builds the foundation that keeps me strong and going. when the storm comes, the wind blows and the flood rises.. (Matthew 7: 24-27)

of course still need to grow in usage and application of WOG in my life more..coz i'm not very strong in that. a lot of head knowledge..But guess God is allowing more circumstances for me to go deeper and let His Word and truth really flows through my life. as He reveals more areas of my life that's not right,not dealt with. Prunning, Sanctification. Can't see all by myself, that's why it's so blessed to have Shepherds & leaders to speak into your life!! given by God..

Worship songs & power of the Holy Spirit

if you play Worship songs and sleep,

you can wake up in the middle of the night being ministered by it.

last night, with a stressed/weary body from a troubled soul and spirit,
i told God i need to like 2 hours to do my Work stuff. REad the SOP and do up my Performance Review/self-assesment.
but at night i was too unable to do anything.
at 4am i woke up being ministered by the song or lyrics. and became wide awake thereafter. I thanked God for waking me up.. because i needed it. this is not the first time. but after like and hour.. i'll go back to the sleepy mode-- work half/un-done.. and go to sleep.

But it was great to experience and be ministered through worshipping God in music, and the Holy spirit wakes you up.

The other time, i was getting sick, my body's like so cold (bundle myself into a ball and try to sleep it away coz nothing else i could do. Like usual, in down time like these, i would switch on my Praise & Worship songs to sleep. That night, in the middle of the night i woke up--with the lyrics of the songs ministering to me. At that point, i knew and i wanted to get up coz I have undone stuff. i needed to go brush my teeth, switch of the lights etc. being woken up by songs declaring the praise and power of God, my spirit was renewed, and i also started to pray in the spirit to give me strenght to wake up from my bed. (was feeling too sick/feverish)to wake up. By the power of the Holy Spirit thru prayer & praising God, lo and behold, i manage to get up after a few minutes.. and it was amazing. Not by my own strenght, but by the power of the Holy spirit

Distress Call

God hold my work in Your hands..

(hold your people in Your hands)

hold my LIFE in Your hands..

Lead me in Your righteousness
Deliver me from sin and the evil one..

if my sheep also abandon me, i will cry..

i pray not, coz You are with me
You are ever before me.

I'm gonna be a History maker..