Attempts to fight with the Sword...

my 'nightmare' is like coming to pass..
the Devil's trap..
how, should I let myself fall and entangle myself while I see it coming? where ever those that comes from intuition, mere feelings..or prophecy
what i fear selfishly is coming true..
God help me..
To look to You..

Above all else, guard your heart, for it is the wellspring of life..
-Proverbs 4:23 !!!!

Was asking where's my SWORD?? (the WORD of God) (hah, just realise SWORD = Spirit+ WORD??)

For the word of God is living and active. Sharper than any double-edged sword, it penetrates even to dividing soul and spirit, joints and marrow; it judges the thoughts and attitudes of the heart
- Hebrews 4:12

Here it is..
And he died for all, that those who live should no longer live for themselves but for him who died for them and was raised again -2 Corinthians 5:15

it's a war..
this is an internal struggle..the Spirit VS the flesh (heart&mind)
it's funny, how when you have to pray or do things (God's will) against your own will, or feelings. Not that I will it but it is the will that comes from within your heart. That cause you to be in conflict.
I can pray for it, nor agaisnt it (as it will not be God's will). Hence I pray for God's will to be done..

The heart is deceitful above all things and beyond cure. Who can understand it?-Jeremiah 17:9

For the sinful nature desires what is contrary to the Spirit, and the Spirit what is contrary to the sinful nature. They are in conflict with each other, so that you do not do what you want. - Galatians 5:17

So I say, live by the Spirit, and you will not gratify the desires of the sinful nature .- Galatians 5:16

Yea..i know..but that's not easy..
So, what needs to be done is to SURRENDER…
Not easy too.. (though last time it 'was' to me..)
What does it mean to die with Jesus? When He died for all (and for me..)

Here is a trustworthy saying: If we died with him, we will also live with him - 2 Timothy 2:11

Dying to self..dying to sin.. But yet sin is alive. But yet, we are also alive in Christ who has risen. IF we die to ourself..

In the same way, count yourselves dead to sin but alive to God in Christ Jesus. Therefore do not let sin reign in your mortal body so that you obey its evil desires. Do not offer the parts of your body to sin, as instruments of wickedness, but rather offer yourselves to God, as those who have been brought from death to life; and offer the parts of your body to him as instruments of righteousness. For sin shall not be your master, because you are not under law, but under grace.-Romans 6:11-14

The death he died, he died to sin once for all; but the life he lives, he lives to God. Romans 6:10